F.A.R.T.

Flatulence Assistance Rectal Tube. If you ever watch Kenny vs. Spenny, you would know what this is. I think farts are hilarious just like the rest of most of you. The sound is hilarious. But I have one problem. I don't want to hear you fart, if it is in my immediate area, I think its disgusting. I don't want to smell it. I guess the problem is the smell more than the sound, the sound is funny. If people farted and it just made a sound, that would be cool. But that isn't what happens. That fart noise becomes a loud warning of what is coming your way. You better get out of the way or that fart smell is going to get all up in your face and make you gag like supermodel trying to lose weight. In my honest opinion there are only 2, count em 2, places someone should be able to fart without feeling bad about themselves. 1) In bathrooms, they already smell bad, thats where you are supposed to do that stuff. 2) Outdoors on a very windy day. I would say just outdoors, but then you get into the whole upwind/downwind problem. If its windy enough you will never smell it anyway. And just to let you know, its not because of the way I was raised, I had a father who was the type who would scrunch up his face and lean his body one direction for optimal fart extraction. Ok, well maybe this action scarred me so much that I don't do it myself. Who knows? I am going to put a poll up here about who farts in public. But for now enjoy this hilarious video: